Pebbles On The Seashore...

And when I look back..

2010-03-01T07:54:00.004+09:00

Life is like a book: what matters is how good it is, not how long it is.

All my life I was the little Alice in wonderland, falling down the rabbit hole hesitantly towards one adventure after the other.. living the reality out of my twisted imagination..

Today I feel, maybe I am just the queen of hearts..

Who liked to celebrate her birthday backwards.

The Excess Baggage

2009-12-21T09:56:00.003+09:00

Packing has always been a painful experience for me. Somehow my judgment of things is just not as critical as my judgment of people.. If packing was a trade, I would certainly be at the topmost level, of sucking at it.. for there's a thin line between the stuff that you want in your life and the stuff that you actually need..

And I just keep losing track of which side I am on.. Cause for me, what I want.. is what I need... So what if it's just for the sense of assurance that it's right there within reach if ever I need it..

So when today I sat out to pack for my trip back home, the memories of my last very sad visit to the airport came back haunting me and it got me thinking.. How much of your life can you pack.. in 20kgs?? Few clothes, basic necessities, a good pair of shoes.. is all that you need to carry, from your past? And is it all that you want?

There's been a joke in my family about me being a junkie.. quite in a literal sense for my inclination towards turning every place I go to into a Junkyard. There was a time I would pick up every interesting looking thing from all over the roads and put it carefully in my own kingdom of dump collection. Later it was books, articles, newspaper cut outs that I would never read again.. Letters, Gifts & Cards from people I would never meet again.. Clothes & shoes that I would never wear again..

And then there was time I had to leave home & everything behind to live my life out of a 20 kg luggage. And in no time this 20 would turn into 60 and I would be standing on crossroads of a dilemma- what to take & what to leave?

And then I learnt my first important lesson.. there's nothing you can hold on to forever.. Some day you have to let go.. Dispose of certain things to make room for others..

Seven years later.. I can not help but wonder if there's a 20 kg limit applicable to people in your life too? Is it true that when you are going to a new place, not only you pack your stuff.. but you try to pack people as well.. the ones you want to stay with you forever? And like we keep accumulating stuff over the years behind that closet, do we also accumulate the carcasses of our relationships, the memories of good times & the bad times behind a little corner in our minds..? And at what point in your life, does it cross the limit of allowed baggage? And what exorbitant price if you may, would you have to pay.. for the excess baggage??

I might never know the answers to these questions..

I might never know when to stop buying stuff I do not need or to stop loving people that are not there anymore..

I might never know if accepting the truth was a right thing to do.. or should I have fought harder..

I might never know when will I stop hoping.. or if I have already stopped..

But what I know is.. Life is not that bad... And even when nothing we would ever achieve would be able to replace what we have lost along the way.. the friends, the confidantes, long phone calls, late night chats, tears & laughter, lucky mugs, wit & humor, curiosity, compassion, ability to love, or that feeling of trust and belonging... We still have the capacity to be happy with our own selves and our 20 kgs of baggage.. for good things are waiting to happen to all of us.. We just have to make room for them.

And clear out the excess baggage..

Pain..

2009-09-09T02:42:00.003+09:00

I'm not good at writing about pain. I'm not good at reading about it either. Yet, it's just pain that I feel these days. And I'm tired of waiting. Tired of waiting for that perfect idea that would transform into a perfect piece of writing to give me that creative satisfaction which I so wrongly long for. Tired of keeping myself busy with all the things that don't matter. Tired of these tiny notches of useless thoughts clouding my mind all day and vanishing just the moment I sit to write, to have me wildly searching for anything.. any word.. any damn thing.. Like now.. Like everytime I try to write..

I'm yet to encounter a feeling more painful than repeatedly trying to succeed at something and failing. Of course there's one at nights when you feel your life is going nowhere. One where you so desperately want to speak to someone and have nobody to call. One where you feel so terribly alone and inconsequential to this world. The one where you are desperately trying to hold onto things which are slipping by in front of you knowing very well there's nothing you can do about it.. One where you muster the courage to give something your best shot only to see it falling to pieces, making you feel like a loser. And the one where you are lying in your bed tightly hugging your pillow hoping that someone would come and hug you just as hard and for a moment all this would stop mattering.

This one moment when you don't want to fight anymore.. you just want to be, saved.

It's time.

2009-05-17T23:43:00.001+09:00

Yes. The time has come.
I am going to write again.

The God's little Angel...

2008-02-20T22:27:00.005+09:00

She opened her eyes
to a world of fairies,
dancing mermaids and
never ending magic..
Pure and innocent..
She was God's little Angel.

She sailed across the seas
playing with dolphins,
making castles in the sand and
marking her territory..
Ever exuberant..
She was God's little Angel.

She made friends out of strangers
with her delightful smile,
leaving them overjoyed and
enamored with her innocence..
lovingly flamboyant..
She was God's little Angel.

She was met instead with a
world of unkindness,
which broke her heart and
laughed at its pieces..
Aching to be loved..
She was God's little Angel.

She shed many an unseen tears
over her shattered dreams,
But she embellished in her pain and
wrote beautiful poetry..
aloof yet alluring..
She was God's little Angel.

She sure wasn't the kind
to drown in self pity,
who could give up on life and
kill the love she had inside..
knowing and determined..
She was God's little Angel.

So she gathered her clipped wings
tended them with care,
Lifted her chin up and
slowly started to fly again..
scared yet impassioned..
She was God's little Angel.

And now she still spreads love
wherever she goes,
rubbing off her charm on others and
touching lives of everyone..
She sure has a magic wand..
For she is God's little Angel.

For Umang, on her Birthday.

The demons within..

2008-02-16T19:08:00.003+09:00

Of all the challenges life throws your way,
of all the fights you'll ever be in..
The ones you'll have with your own self,
are going to be the hardest to win..

For there are times when it's not the world..
piercing your soul with its ruthless eyes..
It's when you seem worthless to your own self,
that a thousand tears your heart cries..

Those days when everything seems to go wrong..
forcing you to question your might..
How is it when your own reflection tells you,
You are not good enough, not bright..

The times when it's you pulling yourself down..
deliberately holding onto your pain..
When you decide not to take the next step,
scared that you might fall again..

Tell me, what are you going to do..
When you turn out to be your biggest foe?
You might run away from the whole world but,
how far from yourself will you be able to go?

The despair which sets in,
like a ferocious beast out on prowl..
Feeding on shattered pieces of your spirit,
Priding itself on a murder most foul..

If only we could kill just as easily,
the demons dwelling in our heads..
The way our parents shoved away,
the ghosts hidden under our beds..

Happy Valentine's Day!

2008-02-14T16:26:00.004+09:00

When love is real.. and hearts are true..
Every day becomes valentine's for you.. no? ;)

I do not believe in these celebrations.. but still.. I do believe in love of those who do..

So, to those.. who are in love...
and to those, who once were..
To those.. who believe in love..
and to those who do not..
To those.. who are expecting flowers & chocolates at their doorsteps..
and to those.. who will be paying for them.. :D
To those.. who are unsure of their feelings..
and to those.. who are scared of letting these feelings known..
To those.. who have a special someone..
and to those.. who do not..
To those.. who want to have their love last forever..
and to those.. who had it once and lost..
To those.. who'll be having candle lit dinners tonight..
and to those.. who'll be watching romantic flicks on their couches.. alone.. ;) :D
To those.. who'll be celebrating their commitment today..
and to those.. who'll enter one..
To those.. who'll send each other dark red cards.. :D
and to those.. who'll hide their love notes under their pillows.. ;)
To those.. who are waiting for someone special to come along..
and to those.. who are scared of being loved..
To those.. who'll be together walking hand in hand..
and to those.. who'll be connected only through their feelings..

Here's wishing you all, a Very Happy Valentine's Day..

And for the rest... Time for us to treat ourselves..
To give ourselves a gift, no one else could give us..
"Let's begin.. to love ourselves, before anyone else.."

Of a love long lost & Memoirs of a Geisha

2008-02-01T00:13:00.000+09:00

I wonder if it often happens to people, when they develop an inexplicable aversion towards the things they like doing the most. Whether it is because these activities stop providing us with that pleasure over the years or because over this long while.. we are not the people anymore what we used to be. I certainly don't know..

When I look back at the time when I used to read almost anything I could get my hands on, I wonder why don't I derive such joy out of reading anymore. But every once in a long while, when I stumble upon a book which I'm actually able to finish.. I wonder if it's me who's reading the book.. or is it the book which is making me read it.

Memoirs of a Geisha.. is more than just a fascinating narrative of the life of a Geisha, as the critics claim. It certainly isn't about a life which was unusual. It's also not about unusual characters. The strength and also the essence of the book is the fact.. that behind the intriguing grandeur and subtle darkness of the subject.. lie simple people led by simple emotions in rather unusual circumstances.

The major reason which makes the book gripping however, remains to be author's entrance into a territory rather unknown & fascinating just because of its outlandish & foreign appeal. For the people who love traveling & exploring new places & new culture, the book is indeed a visual treat in some ways.

The transformation of little Chiyo chan to Nitta Sayuri covers most of the book.. while the events later on are wrapped up rather fast, especially the ending which rather looks hurried & extremely tasteless. A little girl from a little fishing village who was sold off by her father to a life of loneliness & misery.. after fighting the ordeals of pain, separation, uncertainty and suppression goes onto become a prominent Geisha.. led by a mysterious encounter with a stranger. That display of kindness actually charted her whole life and all the major events in the book. . However, the magnitude of the passion which that event ignited is rather indigestible at many occasions. But you have to give such leeway to fiction, I guess.

All the characters have this mysterious intriguing nature about them. You often wish you could know more about them & wonder about their points of view. But, the character of Mameha as Sayuri's mentor & Nobu as her suitor were the most touching. Mameha with her grace & Nobu with his crude gentleness & affection never fail to make an impression. And there's something about Pumpkin which grows onto you.

The narrative is simple & sans too much unnecessary clutter. Even when it's in the form of memoirs.. it lacks the mundaneness and innate self gratification surrounding an autobiography. It's just like somebody talking to you about the major events of his/her life. And here the author takes the cake.. and the accolades.

Triggered by the appetite for reading which was since long dormant.. I'm reading the Divine secrets of the Ya-ya sisterhood now. And I'm not liking it one bit. And I again wonder.. whether it's a good reader that makes a good book or a good book brings out a good reader in us.

Well, I'll never know.

Little food for thought..

2008-01-06T04:14:00.000+09:00

" You know why are you so alone!" She said to him in sheer exasperation.

" Coz, you don't let anyone come close.."

"And you know why are you so alone..?" he asked smiling.

"Coz.. you do. "

Of boredom and a khoya khoya chand..

2007-12-11T01:13:00.000+09:00

A lazy afternoon in one of the oldest halls in India..
Lots of empty seats, and lots of desperate & not so desperate couples..
Movie starts rolling and you are glued to the screen like you are sleeping with your eyes wide open..
As the movie progresses, hush hush about how boring the flick is becomes as prominent as the dialogues..
Finally people around you start to get up and leave the hall in between..
Sonia gives a chuckle in between her yawns and waves her hand in front of my yet wide open eyes suspecting I went into a trance..
"So, how did you find the movie?", she asks grinning..
"Ummm... It depends, you know it's like.."
"why don't you straightaway say it was boring?", said a friend back home.

There could be many reasons behind someone liking a movie not everybody likes.. For one, it could be because you are a weird person with weird tastes.. or maybe cause the plot interests you no matter how poorly it's presented.. or like in my case.. you are more in awe of the emotions behind and in the film than the film itself.. More than being engrossed you are just fascinated..

Coming back to "Khoya khoya Chand", it's a good portrayal of vintage cinema, if not one of the best.
I'm not much into learning about the muck in film industry, the casting couch, the exquisite dresses, the liquor, pseudo intellectualism and its display in filmy parties..
But the tale of hope and broken promises, struggle to keep your pride and seeing it bite dust in front of your eyes, lies, deception, the two faces, love, hate, success, downfall, frustration, the giving up, the coming back.. isn't it what makes the plot of picture of every profession, heightened probably in the Page 3 world?

When you see the nubile Nikhat(Soha) looking sheepishly behind the curtains at the shooting of a song, you see dreams..
When you see the superstar Prem Kumar(Rajat Kapoor) displaying his genius off the camera, you see power..
When you see the fearless Zafar(shiney Ahuja) blatantly mocking the stereotypes, you see fire..
When you see the omnipresent Sharmal(Vinay Pathak) standing up for Zafar, you see friendship..

The story revolves around these four characters.. and in the second half you see how they go about losing everything they achieved.. changing circumstances.. changing people..

When you see tears rolling down the eyes of Zafar making a film of his dreams on his life, you see passion..
And when you see the smile on his face when this film bombs at the box office, on people asking him how hew felt on seeing his film being turned down by everyone, you see pain..
When you see him asking his girlfriend to aid him in getting producers and lashing at her on her refusal, you see weakness..
And when you see him crying in front of his woman, saying he can't take it anymore, you see what failure does to people.. and how difficult it is to hold on..

When you see Nikhat becoming a puppet to everyone she cared for, you see the price of success.. and of love..
When you see her succumbing to drinking and finally see her downfall, you see that nothing is forever..
And When you see the look in her eyes when she surrenders herself to the man she loved, you see hope.. you see redemption..

And when you are able to see that in a flick that seems to be lasting forever.. that means two things.. One, the act put up by the actors was too good.. two, you are thinking too much lately.

I slept while watching "Hazaro khwahishein aisi..", maybe because I was too tired.. or bored.. don't know. :D So can't really comment on Sudhir Mishra. Though I feel bad about it now. For a fraction of second when Om shanti Om flashes through your mind.. you see the clear difference.. of portrayal..
But then there were some things.. like it being too long..(or it just seemed to be.. don't remember) lousy last half an hour.. and a script going haywire.. which spoiled the essence of the film. Sets are beautiful.. one of the most impressive works in cinematography that I've seen in recent times. A good sketch of the cinema in 60s. Not magnanimous but yet appealing. Lovely songs and nicely placed.

Surprise package of the film is Soha.. looking gorgeous.. looking graceful.. vulnerable and her diction.. It's funny, how these stars can't speak a line of hindi without an accent off the camera and how flawless they are in front of it. I guess, that's what acting is all about..

Oh, how was the movie..?
You see, it depends..
on what you see in it..

Sin

2007-11-02T23:17:00.000+09:00

The greatest sin that I ever committed.. was against - Myself,

The day I stopped asking.

Added later: Do read the comments to this post.

I won't surrender..

2007-10-10T01:50:00.000+09:00

However beaten it may be,
You can't keep it under..
My soul's not for keeps,
It just won't surrender..

You said I won't survive,
In your world I don't belong..
You thought I would crumble,
That I was just not that strong..

Every time I rose to fly,
You tried to tie me down..
In shallow waters of mediocrity,
You wanted me to drown..

You mocked my innocence,
laughed at my wide-eyed dreams..
you painted my world black,
When I was looking at violets & greens..

The innocence is now gone,
& I don't dream any longer..
But the desire to hold on,
Has only become stronger..

I know I made mistakes
Infact I still do..
But never will I let again,
Myself be led by you..

Though I'm yet to prove myself,
Am not scared of you anymore..
I know my moment will come,
The one I've been waiting for..

So no matter how many times I fumble,
On this road, I'll keep walking..
For there, right behind my door,
I can see happiness knocking..!

Me against the world.. or me against myself..
Against whom the fight is.. I wonder..
But I know I'll win at the end..
for till then, I just won't surrender..

Of bicycles & tags..

2007-09-30T11:06:00.000+09:00

Once upon a time.. when I was a kid.. ;) I used to ride a ladybird..(The bicycle silly! ;) ) For years I pedalled away to glory.. falling on rails to falling on roads, falling in mud to fracturing my bones.. and I became an expert.. at falling.

Few years later.. when I was a proud owner of a well shattered scooty, thanks to my expertise in "falling", a new bicycle was brought home for my younger sister.
"Can you still ride one?" asked my mom.
"Ahuh? I don't know, I can't. It's been years since I rode one."
"Come on. You can. People who once learn to ride, never forget. And you were so good. Get up, give it a try."

After some more nudging, frowning and raised eyebrows, I finally got up & took the seat. My mom gave me a reassuring smile. Two 360 degrees revolution of the damned wheels, n I fell flat on the floor! I didn't touch the thing again.

Today, when I was given this tag by not one but two of my greatest chums, I felt quite the same way as when I touched that cycle.. for after months of absence from the blogging scene, I was sure that no matter how hard I tried I couldn't write again.. So, after some nudging, frowning, raised eyebrows and you-were-so-good speech, I'm ready to ride again.. and to fall. :)

Umang, Neel n Nikki, this crap is for you! :-*

1. Pick out a scar you have, and explain how you got it.

There's a 3 inch long 2 inch wide scar on my left arm which I have from the time I had just started to sit. It was when my little, ingenious self found an interesting gaming partner in a container containing boiling milk. Rest is left to the imagination. :P Doodh ki jali hui hoon.. isiliye chhachh bhi fook fook ke peeti hoon.. :P :P

2. What does your phone look like?

Like a happy happy pet in the company of a large hearted & loving owner. Takes an hour to accept the enhancement.. has fallen a hundred times.. doesn't ring at its own will.. battery keeps on trying to fall out.. stickers are gone.. has to be hit on wall to make its speakers work.. body's a little..ehm.. These things kept aside.. my babyy is just doing fine. :)

3. What is on the walls of your bedroom?

You mean here in hostel? Nothing, a sick white paint & we have green doors you know, to give us the hospital feel. They are actually making doctors out of engineers. ;) We aren't allowed to put anything on the walls so as to not to blemish the fair n lovely texture of the walls. I once made a friend gift me a king size poster of Will smith on my birthday which I put up behind my room's door so that no one finds out, real fun was when once I heard hush-hush n giggling sounds coming from my room, barging in to find 4 maids crowded near it like school girls. Has to be one of the funniest incidents of my life!
At home.. it's the paintings I made.. on the walls. I'm good with brush.. really. :P

4. What is your current desktop picture?

A Ganesha wallpaper it was before the CPU was sent to a hardware shop a month ago from where it hasn't yet returned.

5. Do you believe in gay marriage?

Yes. Every human being has a right to love, be loved and consummate that relationship into marriage with anyone he/she chooses to.

6. What do you want more than anything right now?

A watermelon. :P
Okay, patience and will power to stick to & finish anything I start.

7. What time were you born?

Sometime between wee hours of the morning and midnight.
That's how my mom remembers it. ;)

8. Are your parents still together?

Yes. They are. Still together n still young n still in love n still the best of friends n still incompatible. ;)

9. Last person who made you cry?

Abhishek Bachhan.. when he got married.. ;)

10. What is your favorite perfume / cologne?

I'm the kind of person you'll find with almost 6 bottles in her hands asking the little dark shopboys, "Bhaiyya, in mei se kaun sa sabse achha hai??" :-P A few years ago, had found one particular fragrance suiting my persona, I absolutely loved the tester. The company went out-of-business the next day. Stopped using Johnson's baby powder when someone said "Tum ab tak baby powder lagaati ho?" :- Now I just keep on experimenting with talcs n stuff. Using fa these days n Kind of love Amitabh bachhan lomani.

11. What kind of hair/eye colour do you like in the opposite sex?

Pink! I have a thing for guys with pink hair n purple eyes. D'oh!

12. What are you listening to?

The voices.. inside my head. :)

13. Do you get scared of the dark?

No. Can't say the same for dark though. ;)

14. Do you like pain killers?

It's like asking a student like me a night before exam- "Hey you, do you like books?" Ofcourse, I don't. But I'll still pick them up if I want to pass. If the pain becomes unbearable, I'll take one. Otherwise, why bother.

15. Are you too shy to ask someone out?

I often wonder if shyness is actually an euphemism for fear of rejection or for pride.
In either case, yes.

16. If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?

Dominoes' cheese burst Pizza with the free garlic bread & cheese dip.

17. Who was the last person who made you mad?

Never mind! I get angry too easily and too often.

18. Who was the last person who made you smile?

VJ & KS, when they promised me two temptations.. Yippee!! :D :D :D

19. Is someone in love with you?

Someone knows better! ;)
Jokes apart, I seriously think our pet turtle is in love with me.. Everytime I go home n take it out of water to play it curls itself up inside its shell out of shyness.. He's pretty cool with everyone at home, but as soon as I pick him up n hold him upside down.. it just refuses to face me.. Dunno why! :">

Phew!! Finally done & over with! Damn, am I talkative? :D
Okay I pass on this tag to Paras. Rest anyone can take up this tag if you have lot of idle time like I do.

All in the name of love...

2007-09-01T07:12:00.000+09:00

I guess am jinxed... Coz People around me keep falling in love.. :D
n sadly... out of it...

I'll be honest.. I don't understand love.. atleast, not the way these people do.. My understanding is limited to what I've seen through their eyes.. n what I've felt.. through their pain..

This poem goes out to them.. n to all those who loved n love.. Their experiences in my words.. Being one eternal optimist, I hate to admit it.. But I know.. it's all true.. :)

When your heart aches for no reason,
& you feel your life stinks,
When happiness looks elusive
& your eyes well up with tears..

When you start shrinking from the world
& you think no one would understand,
When all you do is daydream
& stare at the phone since it last rang..

When you are everywhere yet nowhere
& night forces you to sleep,
When all pleasures look shallow
& something cries within you deep..

When you find yourself helpless
at the way things are going,
When you lock yourself up in your room
While whole world's out enjoying..

When everything reminds of someone
& you start to lose your focus,
When melody loses a meaning for you
& everything tests your patience..

This is the dark side of love
Don't go by its name,
Love's not always beautiful
as some lucky ones might claim..

For sometimes it leaves your heart
with so profound a pain,
That every wordly pleasure
to you looks mundane..

All I want to say is that
Give your heart away with care,
for no matter how many years go by
The scars are always there!!

Back to basics..!

2007-04-04T03:08:00.001+09:00

Finally.. I'm here..
It's been really long since I last wrote.. But, it's not the reason for me to write today..
I'm not writing coz at this moment I don't have anything better to do..
You see, am lying cozily in my bed.. & I can doze off at any moment I want..
I have a novel to finish since ages, & I can finish it..
I've got a lot of home assignments to take care of from class..
I can also scheme a bank robbery in my head, which could possibly make me very rich..
I can philosophise about ways of the world n feel pity for those who don't like chocolate.. :D
I can look back upon my life & try to remember what I was doing at this time of the day 3 years ago.. ( I was sleeping probably, but still...!!!)
I can think about my future & guess what I'll be doing at this time of the day 3 years from now.. ( I'ld be sleeping probably, but still...!!!)
I can think about who should I blackmail to go to a lousy movie with me a week before exams.. & work upon the grounds as to what do I blackmail with..
I can lie down & stare at the ceiling n practice hypnotism on Mosquitoes.. 'Don't bite me..' 'Go bite Paris Hilton' or better still.. 'You are not a mosquito..You are Paris Hilton..'
I can try being creative n write an essay on.. "If I were a lamp-post.." or "If I were a stiletto.." or "If I were a Motorbike.." or better still.. "If I were all these things...say, a motorbike wearing stilettos under a lamp-post.." :D
I can wonder about how long would it take for me to burst if I had a hot chocolate fudge every other day..
I can try to mentally calculate what will be the 76.345% of 187th part of the product of the cubes of first 38 natural numbers raised to the power 4999..
I can make a list of all the movies I've watched more than twice,all the movies I haven't watched more than twice,all the movies I can watch more than twice,all the movies I can't watch more than twice..all the movies I.. :D
I can start writing my own bestseller on.. "How to waste time in 1000 most efficient ways.."
I can look for things I've lost in my 3 yr stay in the hostel.. and if I find them, keep them in a place where I can't find them again..
I can make a list of all the people I want to kill, take voodoo lessons online n kill them.. *eeeehaahaa haa*
I can make a fake id, go to a regional chat room, bad mouth at everyone & run away..
I can clean my room.. *yawwwwwwn...*
I can go downstairs & make all girls unable to watch ekta kapoor's serials for tomorrow by cutting the cable's wire from a place where no one can find out..
I can go to my sleeping friends' room, pick up their cellphones from near their heads,exchange their sims or I could just change the phone numbers of their guy pals n ENJOI in the college tomorrow..
Or I can wake them up at this hour, blame them for stealing my cell phone n then photograph the look on their faces with it..
I can call up all my friends n tell them that I've been kicked out from the hostel for bad behaviour & now I've no place to lodge in,n start crying.. n then when they are about to say anything... yell.."BELATED April fooooool...!!!!" /) :D
I can prepare for the presentation I have tomorrow.. or for the one which is 3 days later..
I can go stare in the mirror n tell myself.. "I'm a well disciplined person.I know how to manage my time efficiently.I'm a competent n hardworking person.I'm a very sweet girl.I'm charming n polite.I never get angry.I'm very patient & diligent.I hate sweets & I hate chocolate fudges.I study regularly.I....."
I can go to market n buy a feviquick to fix the broken stylus of my cell, so that I don't need to use my nails to operate it..
I can do planchette n call spirits n ask them, when will I become the President of USA..
I can write fan mail to Will smith :inlove:
I can reply to my fan mail.. :"> :P
I can sketch portraits... of myself.. :P
I can make an effort to introspect n find out why I'm the way I am.. get depressed.. n promise myself to do something about it.. from 1st of the next month..
I can think.......... about anything I wish..!

So you see.. I have the potential & the freedom to spend my time in whatever way I wish to..
But then, why have I dragged my super lazy ass to write this super shitty piece of crap.. ?

-- For the heck of it!! :D

PS: There's a big difference between everyone's --> *I can do*, *I will do* n *I have done...*. Period. :)

Pebbles on the Seashore...

2007-02-02T17:35:00.000+09:00

I started out to think.. that this is my story..
But when I moved on further I realised that it's not..

No poem belongs to one person.. n this is the most beautiful thing about poetry.. In few words, it can capture the lives & sentiments of many..

This is strange how everyone shares this element of similarity even while juggling with one's own uniqueness.. How everyone wants to blend in.. This poem is nothing but an idea.. a thought blended into rhyme.. you might have felt the same at some point of your life.. or you might have seen this idea somewhere else.. in someone else's words.. But, the core remains the same.. n It always will be n that is..

You are Unique.. just like everyone else.. :)

I've flowers blooming around me
& birds flying high in the sky,
There's so much to be happy about
but still I find myself so dry..

As the world moves swiftly in front of me
I'm standing here all alone,
Thinking if it will lose its pace
When I will be dead & gone..

Will I be remembered with love
like the essence of a breeze,
Or will I be forgotten
the way leaves wither away from trees..

Will the winds stop blowing
Will the rainbow lose its charms,
Will the sky miss me standing below it
Opening wide my arms..

Will the sun reduce its intensity
Will it stop shining bright,
Will the stars & the moon miss me too
gazing at them at night..

Will the earth stop spinning for a moment
& notice my absence,
For all I did was to live a life
without making any difference..

For I lived like a stubborn tide
crashing at random places,
Trying to embrace anonymity
scared of my different faces..

Tried to suppress my individuality
wanted to get lost in the crowd,
Always trying to keep them happy
while my own soul cried out loud..

I always tried to become
what others wanted me to be,
In pursuit of their love
I stopped loving real me..

When the truth basked upon me
like a sudden blow,
I broke into a hundred pieces
Didn't know where to go..

But life's not meant for crying
for nurturing hurt & pain,
With a new sense of purpose & hope
My new journey began..

When bad times come to break you
It's only to strengthen your core,
Coz no matter how tall a rock stands
It has to turn into pebbles to reach the seashore...

Life's tough!!!!!

2006-11-27T16:33:00.000+09:00

There are somethings in life..on which no matter how much you ponder..you never get answers..Like..I could never understand why my family & friends think I'm naughty..coz the truth is..I'm not at all naughty..yeah,maybe a little destructive..n a little clumsy..but that's it..I'm NOT naughty!

I mean..What is this...If something breaks at home,my parents think it's me..If appliances start acting weird,they think I'm behind it...If phone bills skyrocket,they think it's me..If something's wrong with the computer,My bro thinks it's me..n If there's noise in the lobby at 3'oclock in the night,they won't think that a burglar might have broken in,they'll call out my name..:

& my friends?They get blank calls,they think it's me..(JS&VJ!)They start getting weird messages from a friend,they think it's my brain behind them(Vj again!)They start getting love ecards by the names of the classmates they hate,they think it's me!(HS!rmbr pulasto?)They won't give me their gf's numbers coz they think I'll call them & tell them about their previous affairs(BK!)They wont tell me about their crushes coz they think I'll kill them,teasing them!!& If I pay them a surprise visit & call them to meet me,they think I'm playing a prank & dont show up!!!(Vj,VA,Mr,KS,US!)

Now,isn't That heights!!!I mean,come on guys,give me a break!!

Yeah,fine..I blew up the Inverter 3 times,but that was by mistake!How Am i supposed to know we shouldnt use Iron,cooler & heater on Inverter???

Yeah..okay..We got a phone bill worth 7000 bucks for 2 months once,but I swear I didnt do anything!!How am I supposed to know that Reliance has 30 Rs. per hour as their Internet charges??And anyway..Do you expect me to be using Net thaaaaaaaaaaat much???Come on!!!!

& well..yeah..I'm awake at 3 at times,but I dont disturb anyone's sleep knowingly..Infact,I don't switch on the lights purposely,so as to not to disturb anyone..Now when it's so dark,I accidentally collide with things & they fall!!& very very accidentally I step on our dog's feet & he shrieks at the top of his voice!!Now is it my fault???Why does he have to be so black??& why does he have to sleep at the places I walk on?

& blank calls..come on!All I did was to send some 20-30 messages to HS & some 30-40 missed calls to JS from my new number..BIg dEAL!!I never sent messages & crank calls to VJ!!
Okay,I sent some ecards to KG under someone else's name but I had nothing to do with the ones sent to HS!

And that day..I had actually come to malls to meet you guys.Fine..I was lying when I called you to sahara..& When I asked you to come to Dts,I was lying then also..BUt how could you not believe me when I had asked you people to come to metros..??Yeah,okay..I was lying then too..coz all this while I was sitting in the food court near PVR sipping kesar lassi..;)But what If I wasn't lying????& I got you people to talk to my bro to show my honesty & you guys said I asked I threatened some passer by to do that for me!!!Come on guys,how low can you people fall??& all that when we had parked our car just in front of yours!!!Shame on you guys!!!;)

And,as far as teasing is concerned..You tell me VA,Did I ever tease you by the names of all the guys you have ever spoken with in 3rd year????& VJ Did I ever tease you by the names of TM,VA,KS,US,MR,SV,SP,AS???& MR Did I ever ask youwhat's M into M & did I ever mention brown shirt in front of you???

As if all this wasnt enough..My sister says I'm a devil in a buffalo's body..just because I..........D'oh!!!

Sigh...Trust me guys..when you have friends n family like mine..

Life's tough!!!;)

Aaj fir dil pareshan sa hai..

2006-11-25T14:12:00.001+09:00

Ajeeb si uljhan mei fansaa hai,
Aaj fir dil mera pareshan sa hai..

Aasmaan ko chhoona chahta hai,
khul kar saans lene ka armaan sa hai..

Apno mei hai,fir bhi kitna akela hai,
Apne hi ghar mei jaise mehmaan sa hai..

jaan ne toh chala hai har kisi ko par,
Khud hi se dekho,anjaan sa hai..

Jaane kaunsi shikayat hai isko,
dhadak kar,kar raha jaise ehsaan sa hai..

Is khamoshi se darr lagne laga hai,
aane wala koi toofan sa hai..

Ho gaya hai tanhaaiyon mei gum,
Aaj fir dil ka jahaan veeran sa hai..

Ajeeb si uljhan mei fansaa hai,
Aaj fir dil mera pareshan sa hai..

For you..My FRIEND..

2006-11-24T09:28:00.002+09:00

This is for all my Guardian angels..My lovely friends..
Each n everyone of whom's special..
However,these are only words..;)
n I advise you to not to take them seriously..:P

When despair surrounds you
& you see darkness everywhere,
Don't call for me,
'Coz I'll be already there..

When you are loosing the hope
& tears roll down your cheek,
I'll wipe them off your eyes
& will never let you feel weak..

When the momentum's killing you
& expectations are too high,
Together we'll crush your problems
& bid them Good-bye..

When you need a shoulder to cry on
I will come n lend you mine,
& I'll keep holding your hands
Till everything's fine..

So don't you worry baby
Just give me your hand,
I wont let tides take you away
The way they wipe names off the sand..

I don't know where the time'll take us
Dunno where the life's roads'll bend,
All I know is,for as long as I live
You'll always have in me - A FRIEND!

Of Moon & Me..

2006-11-15T16:24:00.000+09:00

Have you ever looked at the moon
on a star studded night?
How it stands apart..
from all the stars shining bright..

When you gaze unfazedly
at the enchanting beauty it owns..
Do you ever look for the tears
behind the charming face it dons..?

When it makes a picture perfect
Dancing with a million stars..
Do you ever wonder if it's just a ploy
to hide its numerous scars..?

While watching this splendid sight
as the night takes its own course
Does it ever strike you that
It too might be living,a life like yours?

When you are standing lonely in a crowd
and you retreat into an invisible zone..
Do you ever give it a thought
that it might be just as alone..?

For there's always a story hidden
behind every happy face..
When like the enigmatic moon above
We all feel.....Out of place!

Zen & The art of motorcycle maintenance-Robert perseig

2006-11-15T10:01:00.000+09:00

One look at the name of the book & you feel this book isn't for you.
Introduction..arouses curiosity & you decide to move further.
A hundred pages & you start wondering why are you reading it??
And this is where you get so frustrated & confused,you either leave the book or start skimming through pages both of which shouldn't be done..for,patience is what this book requires more than intellect..

It's told that 121 publishers turned down the book before it got published & it is not difficult to understand why! For,it's not like the conventional bestsellers which is its biggest weakness as well as its biggest strength.It doesn't sink into your head with the first read...in best words,you could say it's very demanding.It demands your full attention,active involvement with the narrator & his perspective and hence your integrated efforts towards thinking & comprehending.

ZMM is about the narrator's amazing yet credible journey on a motorcycle with his 11 year old son & the things he discovers during the experience in the form of nature's beauty,complexity of people & their ideologies,his attempts to discover his own self & save his relationship with himself & his son.

The narration is in the form of short chapters or monodialogues which he calls "Chautauquas" following the same pattern throughout the book-- something about the journey,something about the philosophy & something about technology in the backdrop of maintaining a motorcycle.

And during this journey he has given dimensions to understanding as classical & romantic and further divided classical understanding into the mind & the matter,subject & object.Thus while combining his own beliefs with oriental philosophy & ancient Greek philosophy & Zen,the author takes us into a long discussion about "Quality" while presenting the world as a trinity of mind,matter & Quality.

Distant concepts come up like nihilism, crystallisation, rationality,Zen, dualism,rhetonic,Dialectic et al. And sadly,most of the times author takes it for granted that all these concepts are known to ordinary readers like me.But since they are not,it adds to the confusion & a sense of distance. Such things make philosophy appear like a dish which looks delectable but is difficult to digest..It's very important that you are actually able to understand the gist or essence of the underlying concept otherwise what's the use bragging on about these concepts which to be honest have not much significance to the common man..when he can't make any sense out of them..What's the use looking for a truth which can't be felt,understood & implemented? Anyways..

This is not exactly a work of fiction.so,there's not much scope of characterisation taking the case of Phaedrus as the exception,which is ironically the "heart" of the book.Narrator's treatment has been very objective towards him which is actually understandable.His intensity is intriguing & it's very difficult to see him as a "ghost" or "evil" form.You feel connected to him on his chase of truth & his failure.

There's something really surprising about the language...except the concepts I mentioned earlier,there are hardly any difficult words..You wouldn't be actually using your dictionary much.Pattern is similar as told.. EVEN THEN,it's difficult to understand,for inspite of all this,language isn't lucid..it's rather very much obscure.

Infact narrator himself says it at one point:
" That..That now..That ties it all together.It feels relieving when that happens.It's so hard sometimes to conjure all this up,a strange sort of exhaustion follows."

At the end,this surely is not a book for beginners & even from the voracious readers it demands a lot of effort.
But in any case,there 'is' something you'll learn from the book,what that something is depends completely on you. For philosophy,be it in any form..has different meaning for different individuals..

So,If you are looking for a book that provides you with literary challenge..grab it..but if you are looking for something that will keep you occupied over a weekend..please,stay away!!I won't say it can change the way you think about yourself & life(As the cover projects) but nevertheless,it indeed is one powerful book.Must read for those who dig non-fiction.

Thinking over the title..

2006-11-14T16:51:00.001+09:00

Door falak mei chamak raha hai, wo banke raja raat ka...
Kya mujhe mil sakta hai, bas ek tukda chaand ka..?

Chaaro taraf bikhre huye hain, banke guroor aasmaan ka...
Kya mujhe mil sakta hai, ek taara mere naam ka..?

Kab se dhoondna chaah rahi hoon, aks apni pehchaan ka..
Kya mujhe mil sakta hai, mauka khud se mulaakat ka..?

Na kisi cheez ka gham hai mujhe, na asar hai ye pyaar ka..
Kya mujhe mil sakta hai, ek naam is ehsaas ka..?

Jahaan dard ka naam na ho, na koi bhed ho din raat ka..
Kya mujhe mil sakta hai, ek jahaan mere khwaab ka..?

Padhkar ye mat udaane lagna, mazaak mere jazbaat ka..
Bhala kabhi mil sakta hai, matlab har ik baat ka..?? :D :D :D

Pyar ke Side Effects

2006-10-07T10:32:00.000+09:00

This is what you get when you set out on a Sunday to watch 'Lage Raho..' without giving it a thought that halls in Gurgaon are jampacked on weekends.You go for any movie whose tickets you can lay your hands on even if it has Mallika Sherawat in it.You go with no expectations at all & in comes your surprise--A feel good & cute Romantic Comedy that will leave you feeling just as fresh..

Now,this review might be biased owing to my personal excessive admiration for the lead actor(Read 'I love Rahul Bose' :D )So,you can skip it if you want..:D

Best thing about PKSE is that it doesn't focus endlessly on the mush factor of love viz. ultra torturous Humko deewana,Fanaa,Kya yehi pyaar hai..n Oh my Gawd!!KANk :/That means,it doesn't have dialogues like "I love you Rahul.Abse main tumhara roz subah usi bus stop pe intezaar karungi,jahan tum mera kiya karte the.." or "Apni aankhe band karlo..ab mera haath thaam lo..Socho ki hum yahaan se bahot door nikal aaye hain..daro mat jia..batao tumhe kya dikhai de raha hai" & KANK's gem "Tumhari train aati hai 10:55 pe..meri aati hai 10:45 pe..fir bhi main kyun roz apni train miss kar deta hoon taaki kuchh lamhe tumhare saath bita sakoon?" :o :oHere,dialogues aren't half as ostentatious (thank heavens) but very witty & humorous.

No unsituational songs & running around the trees in transy saaris & even when it means Delhi/Mum ki galiyaan instead of Switzerland's vaadiyaan,I'm fine with it!Coz cinematography is anyway just as good..

This movie is unconventional & here's where lies its strength.It takes you behind the scenes of an affair without being bitter.And even when Rahul is talking about Pyar ke side effects,engagement ke side effects,shaadi ke side effects & break up ke side effects,you can't trace a hint of cynicism.You know all of them are true & yet you laugh.

The film's characters haven't landed from fairyland.They aren't perfect.Guy isn't taller than the girl here,he doesn't earn more than the girl here,he doesn't win every competition,he isn't a perfect dancer,he isn't afraid of talking about his problems with a girl n he's not ashamed of crying!These are real people.Here,boy & girl don't transform themselves or each other.It's more like men will be men,& girls will remain girls.Be it Cricket,Commitment phobia,aversion to shopping,nasty friends,domi father & blah blah!

Rahul's awesome as always,no one can carry off those one liners like he does..but Mallika's good too.She looks so beautiful & quite amazingly so gracefully feminine.Hers was the best act in 'Darna Zaroori hai' which I thought was by luck but here,she does deliver but Rahul steals the show..:D

Sophie on the other hand is awful as always.Vulgarity impersonified! & She must get a jaw surgery done ASAP!!!Ranveer shorie..:D is at his disgusting best but he's so incredibly funny.You might say "EEEEEEE" at his actions,while he sends you into splits..

Songs are lovely,be it Is this love,feeling blue,pyar karke,dil tod ke or Baby Doll..I loved 'em all (kindly note the rhyme..:D)

& I didn't mind the OTT & senseless climax even.Afterall,in which movie will you ever see heroine fleeing from her wedding in an Auto while her groom's chasing her on a ghodi..;)
That's anyday better than the climax where bride's car rolls off upside down after the wedding(with her unharmed)& hero tries to take her out ignoring her pleas of "mujhe mar jaane do"(??) while the groom stares at the scene thinking.."ye dono ek doosre se kitna pyar karte hain.." D'oh!

KANE & ABEL by Jeffrey Archer

2006-10-05T10:19:00.000+09:00

Kane & Abel is a remarkable tale of two extraordinary men,one born as an orphan struggling to take his first breath on the unfriendly soil of a forest while the other brought into world safely in hands of a highly ambitious father to inherit his millions and..his sharp business acumen.

Born on the same day but in different parts of the world,leading lives so completely disparate that only fate could bring them both together or..Jeffrey Archer's typewriter(or maybe MS word :) )

While one conformed effortlessly into his father's shoes to extend the legacy he was left with delivering every bit of what was expected of him while the other was gathering pieces of his shattered dreams,bearing the loss of everyone he loved & bending the leering jaws of death to build his grand empire..

Their lives intertwined by destiny(& Mr. Archer's genius) to save,to hate & finally,to destroy each other in the backdrop of an all consuming World War II & Great Depression of America,giving us a story that'll be remembered for years to come..

Very well written & engaging,the best thing about the book is undoubtedly its story & then its language.The language isn't very articulate but nevertheless exudes intelligence.Unlike John Grisham,Archer doesn't engage you with unnecessary & tedious(read useless) details,often leaving things for the readers to comprehend making it even more interesting!

Here's one excerpt:

"He turned to go home & saw an old man standing a few yards away in a black coat,with a hat pulled way down on his head,& a scarf around his neck.Not a night for old men,thought William,as he walked towards him.And then he saw the silver band on his wrist,just below his sleeve.In a flash,it all came back to him,fitting into place for the 1st time.First the Plaza,then Boston,then Germany & now fifth Avenue.The man turned & started to walk towards him.He must have been standing there for a long time because his face was red from the wind.He stared at William out of those unmistakable blue eyes.They were now only a few yards apart.As they passed,William raised his hat to the old man.He returned the compliment,and they continued on their separate ways without a word."

One thing I didn't like about the book is Archer has been very partial to the character of Abel :/& kane's end wasn't justified at all! :(
I wonder if it's sequel 'The prodigal Daughter' too will concentrate more on Abel's daughter,sidelining Kane's son. :/

Someone once told me he had read all of Archer's by the time he was 20.Well..this might be my first but I'll surely read them all,while I'm 20.. ;)

Fanaa

2006-08-20T11:14:00.000+09:00

Ahhhh...fanaa...

When I had come out of the theatre with a long face...I had thought I couldn't enjoy the movie because of the nasty backache I had which lasted throughout the movie n cured miraculously as soon as I sat in the car..(guess they got something in the seats.. ;P)

As for the movie..I second with everybody that it was an Okay movie..i found it to be very impractical..but then most of them are..

Kajol luks fabulous in the muvi..The glow on her face can't go unnoticed..n her smile just lights up the screen..
Amir..just when u think..awwww,he luks soooo old..he luks so strange..His new look in the second half makes u say..oh he lukd so better in long hair..
Then there is this kid..n he's the most beautiful part of the movie..I was so much in a hurry to leave the hall that i cudnt stay to look for the name..but this kid is very cute..n the dialogues that were given to him were very cute too..It was a treat to watch him..

Performances were gud..storyline..naah..n sum things in the muvi just get to you..especially in the first half..all that sick sms shayri..n that ws too much of it actually..I mean,if at all it was required..cudnt they put their lyricist to sum work n write new ones 4 them...??instead of directly stealing it all..except one or two..all were lame..n their romance..in the start..that makes u feel so uneasy..soooooo..u know.. :D

n second half was disappointing too..or mayb it was just my backache..i jst dont know.. :D
Songs..Subhan-allah is as everyone knows a lovely song..but i really loved the video of "mere haath mei.." a lovely song n a beautiful video to go with it..that rain song was okay too..apart frm tht rest two r just ordinary..If sumbdy's havin MCs..i think fanaa's remix is also very gud..n tht instrumental theme..

N then there wre lot of random characters..added just to put weight in th muvi..in random 30 seconds roles..some lasted till 1 minute of the screen time too..n they hv hiked ticket rates fr fanaa..i wnder why..As if 150 wasnt enough.. But still..the movie is okay for a one time watch...not good..but not too bad either..But kajol fans shudnt be disappointed at all..both luks wise n actingwise..she dusnt disappoint..

Blink by Malcolm Gladwell

2006-07-29T11:33:00.000+09:00

"I knew from the first few pages of Gladwell's Blink exactly what I thought: I'm gonna be up all night reading this..A smart,breezy celebration of intuition..kept me hooked to the final page."
This is one of the statements made in 5 page acclaim for Malcolm Gladwell's Blink..So,can this book keep you up all night? No,it can't..But as far as hooking you to the last page is concerned..It sure scores high!

Gladwell entered the best seller arena with The Tipping Point & it seems he's all set to stay there with blink..for long!Blink talks extensively about how brain works in the Blink moments,your first impressions,instincts,snap judgements et al. and how they can be startingly correct & just as startingly--Wrong!

As the author himself says the first task of Blink is to convince you of a simple fact: Decisions made very quickly at the spur of the moment can be as good as decisions made cautiously & with deliberate research.It in a way tries to probe into the age old issue of how powerful is your unconscious.But instead of rattling endlessly just about how influential one's unconscious is (which most of the psychology books tend to do..), this book also talks about its fallacies.How at times,your instincts deceive you into making wrong decisions,how your powers of rapid cognition tend to go awry for a very specific & consistent set of reasons & how your snap judgements can be educate,controlled -- Influenced!

Best thing about Blink is that it doesn't deal with hardcore & sadly, boring scientific terminologies..Not for once does it talk about Oh-My-God-How-Do-I-Pronounce-It type chemicals & hormones.Rather,it uses a series of interesting anecdotes & compelling stories from completely different walks of life to make his point.

One thing you can't deny is that this one is a very exhaustively researched book.Also,most of the events described in this book happened in the recent times,so it was easy to relate to them.Though,Gladwell has been a journalist,still all the incidences described give impressions more of a storyteller than a journalist.His dissection of the events make a very interesting reading.

But what beats everything else is his ability to find similarities between completely disparate fields of study & not only that,he startles you with the revelations that are completely going to bowl you over,for most of the times they give some really powerful insights into marketing,advertising,business strategies,political tactics,relationships,defence & what not!

And come to think of it,some of them are very ordinary pieces of information which we would generally skim over & he turns them into delightful & gripping case studies!

Like we have one Pepsi's challenge where Coke lost onto Pepsi due to blind sip tests, the phenomenal victory of a team led by a retired millitary commander against one equipped with high powered satellites & sensors & supercomputers.How adrenaline rush led autism & unconscious led bias led to one unfortunate & infamous death,how an estremely talented singer's career went into jeopardy inspite being acclaimed by experts due to fallacies of surveys,how a chair once written off as chair of death later went onto change the norms of ergonomics.How during speed dating people end up choosing partners exactly opposite to what they wanted.How a product's packaging dominates over its content.How salesmen decide bargains based on prejudicesregarding gender,race & looks and so many things that will leave you gaping for more.

The message is simple -- Every moment - every blink - is composed of a series of discrete moving parts & ever one of those parts offer an opportunity for intervention,for reform & for correction.

Only problem with the book..too much repetition..& tends to get really confusing at places..Certainly not something you can digest in one go..But,a good book..As one Library Journal says.."For once a best seller will be more than worthy.."

Doctors by Erich Segal

2006-07-27T11:28:00.000+09:00

Erich segal's Doctors..Liked it a lot..n ws a better read than love story..
I mean i just dont know why I didnt like love story much in the first place..ther's a book by danielle steel "Fine things" I happened to read that before love story..mayb that's y..:

I kno that Fine things n others many in the league are inspired frm love story only..n original is original..but as i said..I cant help it!

As for Doctors..It ws very moving..wud hv been better if shortened a bit..The climax went too overboard n filmy..n lukd like n attempt to connect the characters of the book..the "platonic" frdship between the protagonists laura castellano n Barney livingston ws really remarkable..

But most of all i liked th character Bennet landsmann..but he ws put to n abrupt n fast end..while he ws the most promising characters of them all..I wish I cud hv more of him in the book..

I like the starting n ending lines of segal..they r quite well written..enuff to create interest..but the matter inside is not always too good..I mean,though its all very moving..emotional..but still very filmy..There r places where u expect miracles for ur favourite characters..n they dnt happen..n there r places where thz miracles happen out of the blue n sudden..

What i din like..How stories of sum of the characters were left just like that..I mean partiality towards laura n barney wsnt justified..But all in all....I luvd reading it..parts abt barney were cool...n bennet..n okay laura too at times..n the frdship they all shared...I even liked seth lazrus..n i wantd 2 read more about lance mortimer...

A gud book..

36 China Town

2006-07-26T10:55:00.000+09:00

If your brain works too fast..If you don't have a sense of humour..Please stay away from this one..

Wht do you get when you try to mix comedy with a murder mystery with a romance between shahid-kareena,paresh-payal,johnny-tanaz?
Answer..a piece of crap..called 36 china town..

A loose plot..predictable..the directors forget at times what they want..suspense,drama,thrill..or romance,comedy..?coz this muvi has none of them..

First the story..
A casino heiress is murdered n 6 ppl are the prime suspects..n you automatically know..none of them is the killer..They get to the scene of the murder due to some or the other reason..n are scared to their wits when the investigating officer comes in..
Now starts..events..which at times will send you into splits..n at times..will make you feel like pulling your hair..

Abbas-Mustan???:o
Whts wrong????

Songs..AA aa ashiqui is one awesome song..n so is rock your body n one party song at the end..rest is soo soo n absolutely all of them unsituational.but choreography???oh my god..you see so much of red in them..you feel like puking..

Actors..Shahid is at his overacting best..he was far better in dil maange more..
Kareena..thank god..she doesn't have much of dialogues..she looks like a doll in the muvi..n that's what she has done..pinned up like a doll..no acting,nothing..just weird facial expressions..
Johnny lever..His time was finished right then when he came as the second lead in govinda's Joru ka gulam(one of the worst ever made),but i must confess..at times he was really funny..rest of the times..looked repetitive & stale..
Paresh raval..better than all the rest..but story was so awful..his role of a gambling prone hotelier..couldn't do anything to save the movie..but the funniest sequence of the movie comes from him..
Tanaz n Payal Rohtagi..The lesser said the better..
Upen patel..9820 420 420..oh my god!!!!n his pick up line..Is your dad a terrorist..??Can any joke be older than this???His long drive action is funny..Dances well..but acting???not his cup of tea..

Only good thing about the movie???????
Akshay khanna..had it not been for him n his million dollar smile..film would be a disaster..Every scene he is in..you can watch without sulking..
This guy rocks!:)

All in all..a disappointing film..

Life Or Something Like It..

2006-07-12T10:14:00.000+09:00

On this stage called life
God gave me a wholesome part...

I took it up as a liability..
Never realising that it was a gift,
A chance for me,to grow as a soul..

I whined over the obstacles I faced..
Never realising that they were blessings,
Given to me to polish my abilities..

I yearned for the wordly pleasures..
Never realising that the biggest wealth is love,
Which was already given to me as a family..

I asked for strength,I asked for power..
Never realising that strength lies not in being a winner,
But living as a survivor..

I asked for opportunities to make it big..
Never realising I already had it in form of time,
Which I always let passby,dreaming about the future..

I asked for good luck..
Never realising it was all in my 10 fingers,
To change my lines of fate..

I despised griefs & ran after happiness..
Never realising that griefs were what made me humble,
And taught me the art of thankfulness..

I took failures as setbacks..
Never realising the failures made me level-headed,
And strived me to give my best..

I asked for this,I asked for that,
when it was all there right in front of me..
I longed for what I did not have,
When all I needed was what,I already HAD..!

---

Welcomme to My Buhlog!!

2006-07-11T03:28:00.000+09:00

Frankly speaking,for as long as three long years of my fidgety life(that's when I had first heard the term blog..)I couldn't understand what's the deal with blogging..Many times,I purposely ignored the term like I always ignored my increasing weight --I knew it was there but wouldn't do anything about it..:)Till now that is..!

The idea of an online journal where I could scribble all the crap I manage to think in a day's time,never appealed much to me..& on top of that,letting other people peek in & comment on the histrionics of my restless mind..??Naaah..not for me..I was more than just happy finding solace in the pages of my personal diary..

In my 20 yr old life span..I've had 5 diaries..Three of which were caught & saw an untimely demise..one is safely tucked somewhere in my almirah..It's safe there coz it's impossible to locate it behind that unmanageable heap of books..& anyway my entire family is allergic to books..so nobody's gonna peek in there..& last one is gathering dust from last 2 yrs..I scribble very occasionally..when I'm too sad or when I'm too happy..or when I get too philosophical..or simply when I've absolutely nothing to do..!Now,since I spend my entire day doing just nothing..I've stopped writing diary completely.Not that I've stopped thinking now..It's just that I'm too plain lazy for that..;)

So what brings me here?In case,you've come this far just to find out the reason for my sudden change of heart..I'm sorry,you'll have none..It might be that I don't want to tell you or maybe it's just that I dont knoW for myself..:P

What matters is that,after whatever minor major bloopers..I'v finally made it!!and AHHHH...How am I lovin' it..!!Seriously,the joy of creating something on your own is one of its kind..:)

So,ladies n gentlemen,friends,foes & strangers..Lemme present before u for the very first time(It's not exactly the very first time..but never mind!)--MY Buhlog..!!

And what I'm going to write about..?I'm not so sure..for a while it'll be just me,me,me!!My life..my friends..my views..& just when you'll start wondering if I'm some self-centered freak,i'll come up with something else..;)Till then,bear with me..n keep watching..

And now with this..I end my first note..Thank you for being with me so far..I dont expect your brain to work on same wavelength as mine does..& anyway,am not much of a writer person..So,It's quite possible you don't like what I say in the coming posts or you might just not understand..Whatever be it..I would love it,if you leave your feedback..:) n more than that,i would love it If you write back your own opinion too..About how YOu feel about a subject..I'vent written any thing so far..but very soon..I will..n Would love to hear from you..

Till then..Stay beautiful..!